Hello old Friend

So nano is happening, I think. I am not really sure anymore. I don't really like my novel. I liked my first one but that is something that I've been keeping bottled up in me ever since high school. Link is a charecter who has litterally grown up with me and while I haven't commited his stories to paper they were always there. Link was the polar opposite of me, moody, depressed, overtly suicidal, strong, violent, and when I started expoloring him I started to become more like him at an alarming rate. It was scary. His stories used to take place in Highschool, he saved Sara from a school shooter that planned on starting a rampage with her. Then he ended up in collage some how, and now he is dead. He doesn't have to stay dead but I read to many comic books and I should just create someone new not hump someone dead. I reserve the right to change my mind.

The book I am writting this year I don't like nearly as much. The charecters don't click and none of them feel very alive to me. I am also having much less fun with it this year than I did last year and it is becoming far more like a chore than something that I should be celebrating. And yet I did spend half of the day deciding what will happen next so I guess I will finish it. That means I absolutely need to write every day for the rest of the month with at least one marathon writting session, but I am more than likely going to need two. Fortunatly I still have two days off, and I have two scenes I am directly interested in writting so I guess it is going to happen. Though I think if I reach 50k and it is still not done it is going to stay that way.

Watch though two years down the line I am going to come back and finish it or rewrite it. I actually want to do a short story in the same vein except I want to use mythological charecters instead of these actual people, so it would be the trumpeter, the anti christ, the 4 hoursemen, the indian god that dances the world to death, and some other people and they would be doing something or other.

That is the thing though, writting has indeed become part of my routine and it is a lot of fun. So I am going to start doing more of it. Not blog writting like this but actual fiction writting. Going back over some of my old notebooks I used to be really bad. Then I got better, and eventually I was really good. Then I stopped. Well now I am going to start again, and get good again. This of course means sacrifices. Naturally I think I should dump some more of my social life in the toilet but that would mean giving up on Tuesdaynight malifuax and I JUST STARTED THAT, and anime club, and my eventual return to gming. So lets not do that. Guess that means city of heroes. Of course coh is one of those games that can be played on a righteously casual basis which is how that is going to happen from now on.

However, the other day at work I realized something. Where I to rank my prefered activies in the order of brain power it takes to be able to do them it would be:

From lowest to highest:

1) Hanging out with and just generally conversing with people
2) Soloing in an mmo
3) grouping in coh
4) Reading most comics, computer strategy games
5) Reading most books and harder to read comics
6) Reading hard books, retaining new information from ttc lectures, most action oriented video games, competative board games et cetera
7) Touhou

It goes on from there. The point is that playing mmos is on the low end of the spectrum of brain thought for me. It is a good thing to do if I am tired or worn out from work but it shouldn't be an every day thing, it definitly shouldn't be something I do for multiple hours every day. And so it is going to fall a little bit by the wayside. I'll still do it, but I definitley want to spend more time writting and creating things, or playing games with friends than playing videos games period.

Also, and this is critical less time just arbitrarly fucking around on the internet. This is the absolute worse waste of time I do and that above all things needs to end. I think it will though. I fell into a pretty powerful deep blue funk this past month. While there I learned a few things that I will prolly write about at a later time. For now though, I am much better and I aim to keep it that way motherfuckers! YEAH!