Thursday, July 30, 2009

Abort, Retry, Fail

Every time I've seen this in a computing context I want to put my head down on the desk and weep. It is an option with three choices that all lead to the exact same result, a repatition of the question and an increasing amount of frustration. Oh yes some things have very definatly gone wrong, no doubt, but there is nothing you can do but hit the reset button, cross your fingers and hope that you will not see the trinity of failure again.

Fortunatly I am not a computer and I don't have to deal with the trinity of failure on an internal level. Cause, god damnit did I ever crash hard this last week or so. That last blog post, it was the start of the end. I don't know what happened, or why it happened but I did not like it. Raw unfocused anger running around my body is not something that I approve of. It reminds me of both a path I would of rather of not taken and of people who I don't really like very much. As a result I pulled the plug. All creative endeavors, thought processes, residual memories, all of it got scrapped. I took it all threw it out, buried it deep, and pissed on its grave. Take that you motherfuckers. I really did pick the best tool ever to grind my thought process to a stop too, and that is a good old fasioned Korean MMO. Ironically that game actually happens to be a great deal of fun, and highly engaging but we'll work on that element later. I think it is more than a little wierd that I just sort of yanked the plug on my forebrain but these things do happen. I could feel it to start back up when while playing atlantica I got the distinct desire to learn arabic script.

Lets face it now Arabic script is some prolly the most beautiful form of writting on the face of the damn planet. Whatever I don't care if you agree or disagree. The thing is though I am not even sure of how their alphabet works. See part of the problem with chinese/japanese is that I more or less have to learn the language from the ground up to do calligraphy. This is especially true when I try to treat the individual Kanji as one singular unit instead of a grouping of randomized lines. In order to do that you have to essentially memorize not only the Kanji but how to properly put it all together. Chinese calligraphy is weird.

However is Arabic calligraphy is based off of an alphabet then I could just learn the letters and do some half assed translation from english to know what I am going to figgure this out right now. TO WIKI!

Yeah okay so they have a an alphabet, but I would need a linguistics text book to understand it because sometimes that is just how Wiki rolls. That is okay though because wiki has a linguistics text book, and I'm sure once I get the basic charecter's down this whole thing will flow much much better. Of course every letter having a diffrent form depending on where it is in the word is more than slightly annoying and might be beyond what is quickly becoming a passing interest. Or not, I need a book on the subject because WIKI is pissing me off and royaly distracting me.

ANYWAY the point of all of this is to get the ball rolling again. It reboot my sagging thought process and make it move once more. Crashing definatly has its disadvantages primary among them is the amount of momentum I just had smashed into dust. I worked hard for that momentum and I am now looking to get it back and the only way to do that is to just start writting, reading, thinking, and moving no matter how bad or off the wall it is. Starting here.

I think I am now going to go mentally run after the marxism thing.

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