It Is Apparently Christmas

That is all I am going to say about that. I am at work, no one else is here, and I am just waiting for dishes to come back so I can do them and go home. I have to be here at 6:30 tomarrow. I volunteered for this as it was strictly optional but I have grown to like working the morning shift on Sundays. There is this certain blissful liberating feeling of looking out over the dish area, seeing that it looks compleatly like shit and just walking away without a care in the world. I like that. Granted it messes up my sleep schedual something fierce and I usually end up passing out at around 5 and waking up at 9 or so but meh it is okay.

I don't really have anything to say though. So you can stop reading here. I was going to compare the evolution of the pokemon series to the evolution of mmos, paticularly how polish and quality of life improvements always seem to accompany a lack of in game challenges. However, spending any amount of time on a game that has a flaming poop monkey just seems like something that isn't going to happen. Also I am not fucking joking about the flaming poop monkey that shit is real. For anyone who is curious the new pokemon game is really good and well worth picking up when it comes out over here. I like it!

I watched the whole first season of Boardwalk Empire over the course of two days. What a good show. I am not so sure I want to see the downfall of Nookie Thomson but whatever, I'll get over it. If he does go down compleatly, and I don't see how he can't at this point, I wonder if they are going to continue on with the show or just move on. The prohibition officer is definitly one of my favorite charecters of all time and he is just as terrifying as the priest from Carnival. In fact should they ever decide to reboot or recontinue that series I would demand that casting change to be met. He is born for that role and the just stuck him in Boardwalk Empire instead, how weird!

Skippy Dies is something that I am more than half way through with. It is strange because other than the death of skippy I litterally have no fucking clue what the hell is going to happen next in that book. I mean I have some general ideas but not a whole lot. I would like to reiderate that this would be an increadbily fun book to write papers on or about. Hell the book itself is a great deal of fun and it manages to hit really close to home with me but without pushing a whole lot of buttons or setting me off. That is pretty impressive too because I can be rather volitile this time of year. It is an impressivly fun book and I am still glad it is happening to me.

Oh and I saw Black Swan! And my goodness was that ever worth seeing. That movie is a mindfuck in a half! Great fun all around. Go see it. The other day someone actually complained that the smurf movie being set in new york city was lazy storytelling and of low intelectually value. At that point I wanted to reach through the internet, bitchsmack the person a dozen times while yelling it is the mother fucking smurfs they excist to sell fucking toys. Shut up shut up shut up. However it was around christmas so I decided not to. Tomarrow though if it is still bothering me I will go and make my displeasure about that paticular comment known.

Hrm I am almost out of time, I am not sure what else to say. This year was a pretty mixed back. When you tally up all the good and bad they pretty much equal out. However, when it is all said and done the year as a whole was pretty sedate. Not complaining, life is a turbulant place and there were some definite upheavals but there were also long moments of relaxation and joy. I am very lucky to have the friends I do. We went to see Black Swan! That makes them>you.

Kk I am going to go labor for love now.

Movie Time with Mike! For Real Now!!

Okay well that was a hell of a distraction. Back to the butter tarts. MOVIE TIME WITH MIKE!

So recently I threw a movie night of one and it was amazing! I loved my movies very very much. It ended up being dragged out a couple of days but there will certainly be spoilers but I don't plan on screening anything I watched at Anime club so that's that then.

Ip Man2: I both liked the sequal more than the first more and I didn't like the sequal as much at the originial. The original has hands down better action sequences. This is subjective and it is easy to disagree with me here but hey my opinion go! The reason I say this is that Ip Man had believable fight scenes. I looked at them all and I belived that a person could do all of those things with a life time of training and dedication. The sequal's mass fight scene just didn't really resonate with me. I mean sure it was badass, and super cool don't get me wrong but it started to feel a little bit to scripted. Like there was a director getting people to all make sure the two protagonists win. However, I will say that the table fight scene was truely bad ass.

HOWEVER, storywise Ip Man2 wins out hands down and it does something I didn't expect at all. It demythologises martial arts. I guess this is something that most people who practice martial arts knows but this movie showed that a man tained to take punches, made of muscle, and who is just plain bigger can be hard to take down even if you are a kung fu master. Wa? Okay well things happen and the two bad ass kung fu masters in the city, Ip Man and someone else face off againt a boxer. You know boxing? Back in the day it used to be a major sport that everyone liked. Anyway, the other guy dies, and Ip Man only just barely manages to beat him. It is interesting though, I mean it is a point that is brought up in the Tony Jaa movies The Protector and Ong Bak. However, in a chinese movie showing off how bad ass martial arts is, it seems weird that their golden boy would get his ass kicked royally. The movie ends with Ip Man hoping that there will be a greater degree of respect and communication between China and the west.

DIVERSION! The Chinese movies that end up over here are really weird. I am not talking about the festivle scene cause that is its own thing. However, Ip Man and Ip Man2 are very chinese movies that can be really difficult to understand without knowing a little bit of chinese history, especially just before, during, and after WW2. In fact I have no fucking clue what the opening montage of Ip Man 2 meant. I am sure I would if I knew a little bit more about what happened to china during the war but I don't. We are the west we don't talk about china. Like why there hell were there so many british people in Hong Kong, and why were so many of the running the police departments and what the hell was going on. A lot of stuff I had to just take and run with however it doesn't stop there, I mean look at Red Cliff. Uneditied RedCliff is well over 3 hours. While western audiences were afflicted with a brutalized horribly edited version of the movie that I acidently screened at Anime club it is still something that is MASSIVELY culturally specific to china. I mean just the battles, the way the battles were conducted, and the way the action played out. I don't know a lot about Chinese culture but basically everything I didn't really understand I realized was prolly something pretty culturally specific to china. I am good at rolling with the punches though so it worked out. Then there is Hero. The ending of Hero is one of those distinctly unamerican ideas. America likes to believe that we all matter and that every one of us is special and that our government looks at all of us and sees us all. Don't beleive me? Go watch Saving Private Ryan. However, Hero dies at the behest of the masses. I found the scene to be absolutly chilling but the movie treated this as standard operating proceedure and they still buried him as a hero even though they killed him ded. I have no idea how people chose what chinese movies get brought over here but I amazed at thier cultural specificity especially considering how wide their release is.

Moving on!

Foreign Duck, Native Duck, and God in a Coin Locker: What a neat little movie. First it is a movie that highlights the generally prejudiced attitude that the Japanese have twords forgieners which makes them basically like everywhere else. I mean that's fair really. I actually don't have very much to say about this movie other than the fact it was awesome. It is also one of those things that really highlights how weird the pacing in Japanese movies are compared to their western counterparts. The movie meanders, it retells events from different perspectives, and it takes its time building a relitivly small picture. Like I could reedit the movie into a 45 minut piece that just pretty much tells the story straight through. However, it doesn't really capture the budding friendship or just the increadible sadness that is at the core of the movie.

For all intents and purposes the stakes of the movie are incredibly small and yet the charecter's treat them as monumental. Basically it is about a group of friends encounting a group of people who are mutilating and killing animals, conflict ensures, there are fatalities on both sides, and then the movie wraps up. When you total the body count at the end of the movie I found myself wondering if it was all worth it. The movie sells its point really well though and I like I said earlier I love it. Go see it you will be sad but satisfied.

Dinner Rush: The crown jewl of my movie night has to be Dinner Rush. I first heard of the movie through a preview for another movie. I tried to find it but I couldn't. Shamefully the movie rides the crack between an indie release and a minor release. I am pretty sure it went staight to DVD and while the cast is increadibly talented it lacks any of the STAR quality that makes people wanna go out and see things. This is miserably sad because the movie is increadible. I am actually not going to talk to much about it because the movie itself is worth the journey. See I am not one of those, "Oh noes I know the end of the movie I can't see it because it is all ruined now. I think that is a bunch of bullshit. Movies, media in general for me is about the journey. It is about absorbing the whole package. I mean even if I were to tell you point by point what happens in Forgien Duck you'd miss the meaning because it is the way the story is told that makes the movie not the actual events. Dinner Rush isn't like that though. It is one of the very few movies that is impossible to predict. I follows no known plotting or rhythm. It got to the point where when the movie ended all I could say was, "Huh well I saw none of anything that happened in that movie coming". The setting of the movie is pretty much a charecter in of itself and it is the main vehicle which is used to drive the movie fowards. The entire thing takes place in a high end italian resutrant that is owned by two old school mobsters that are going straight, durng the dinner rush on a tuesday night. As a result you have mafia types, art dealers, food critics, and all sorts of other things rushing around demanding attension and eating lavish amounts of truely delicious looking food. We get a look at the poor harried waitstaff, the frantic action within the kitchen, and the blissfully unaware customers who just want their food and the atension of their waiter. The movie is literally a bitz of action that crashes home into a satisfying conclusion that leaves you satisfied but more than a little bit hungry. It is great fun and it leaves all sorts of little details eveywhere that you can pick up on later if you are quick. Go see it.

Lastly Air Doll. Air Doll happened a day or two later because of a burning acident. Anyway Air Doll is quite literally the happiest sad movie of all time. Like now that it has happened to me, and oh god did it ever burn, I think I might just turn it off at a certain point and pretend that the real ending doesn't happen. I mean there as sad endings and then there is this movie. Jesus christ that movie just burns. 80% of the movie is watching the main charecter movie around and being the cutest thing in the universe. I mean we are talking Amilie levels of cuteness.

Erm right. So the movie is about a blow up sex doll who for no real reason comes to life one day. She is imbuned with a heard that allows her to think, feel, and move of course. She finds the world to be an absolutly wonderous place, fascinated by glass bottles, chintzy rings, and sounds. Oh there is this one scene where she runs her umbrella along a row of dvds and she looks so absolutly pleased with herself. Oh and one of the most adorable scenes ever is when she is blowing herself up using a foot pump. It actually struck me dumb. Randomly she gets a job in a dvd store and moar cuteness ensues. By the way the dvd store makes this movie a movie lovers dream. Some of the movies the owner mentions are japanese but because I watch to many movies I've heard of most of them, the rest are american and genuinely good choices. One guy asked for a movie featuring a dirty cop, like the absolute worst sort of guy. Now at this point I am on the edge of my seat because I am hoping he is going to spit out a Japanese title. I love movies about dirty cops they have a special place in my heart and they are relativly rare. Nope instead he spits out the title Bad Lieutenant which is a fantastic choice and it really is Harvy Keitel at his worst. Well done little asian dude, well done.

Anyway about 80% through the movie it decides that it is time to start ending. So it does it in the most bone crushingly sad way possible and then it is over. I nearly cried. Still well worth the dig. SEE IT.

Okay I am now really tired of writting so this blog post is now over.

Movie Time with Mike!

I've realized that actually have no idea when Christmas is, I don't really care either because Christmas is one of those face punching holidays but holy fucking shit I sincerely thought it was next week. I don't know why I thought that but there is literally every car ever on the road and while I only planned to run by TBS looks like I am setting up shop here until I feel like leaving. This is okay for me, for one they have Sweet Tooth 2! Which is something I want very much greatly and I wouldn't of known about otherwise. They also have free WIFI and I have sunkist so everything is pretty groovy for now. We'll see how things go from there. I am hoping that in an hour or two I'll be able to leave. I am feeling productive today and I wanted to convert one of my long boxes into a minature carrying case. Pack some foam in it then use carboard as dividers I think it will work really well, this is paticularly true considering the fact that I am going to end up with several 50mm based figures. So there is that.

I suppose I could do that here, but that is something I'd want to do on my own so I can do my own thing. I was considering getting a fancy briefcase carrying case thingy but after the great criminal enterprise I decided against it, mostly because I no longer have enough minis to make it worth while.

So I guess I will just move the movies post to the next one. ANYWAY. I decided that my next two crews will be Seamus and McMourning. See by rebuying my Seamus stuff I'll have a bunch of stuff I can use with McMourning until I get around to actually buying all the stupid little dogs and everything for him. I also need Waldigists for Lilith but that will come later if ever. I would make people come down to TBS and play with me but it is already close to 2:30 and there is lots I want to do today so we will hold off on that. The biggest problem we have is finding a place to play. I'll be glad when the commons are back open and we can continue to play there.

You know it is weird how few people play McMourning in Malifaux. I mean he is a freaking mad scientist with zombie dogs, his stat line lets him pretty much decimate every charecter in the game just so long as no one hits him, and he can heal regularly without soulstones. What is not to love? I am excited about getting him. He can whip about the battlefield doing his thing. I am actually going to exparament running him without zombie dogs. I mean you can run Leviticus without abombinations, so I assume you can do the same with McMourning I mean there are just pretty much there for speed bumps anyway. I can do the same thing more effectivly with necropunks, necropunks look cooler too.

Alright well I am going to move on to movies now.

Principality

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Paradime Shift mebby?

I was going to do a movie night round up but I don't think I am going to have time to give Forgien Duck the space it deserves and it really does deserve a lot of space. I also want to gush about Dinner Rush. You know it is a good night of movie watching when Ip Man two is the lowest point of the evening. But that is how things go. Anyway! A thought occured to me midway though the second movie that other people would of enjoyed doing this with me. Movie night with me can be pretty intense. Every once in awhile I will just go off the deep end and watch stuff like I Stand Alone and Irreversable. Okay actually I am not sure I ever want to see Irreversable again, and if I do I want it to be on a big fuck off screen so I can get the full effect of the nausea. Yes the nausea the movie is desighned to make you nauseous and trust me it does without the spinning camera trick. There are other times where I will put something on like August Underground, Visitor Q, Gummo, and Happiness without any sort of regard for the people around me. I had sex to the Piano Tuner of Earthquakes. That doesn't even make sense but I made it happen because there is nothing like sex+the most amazing stop motion animation you are ever going to see.

I love movies. I don't love the safe quiet sterialized holywood approved crap, but sometimes they do make some bloody good stuff. The Tourist isn't one of those things. See that movie at your peril and note that if you loved the Tourist you don't want to do movie night with me, your face will melt off Invaders of the Lost Ark style and I will drink your blood. I don't even like blood it is salty but I will do it anyway.

That is sort of the philosphy I take when it comes to movie time, often times I won't know what the hell I am going to watch because I can't be bothered to read descriptions I judge things based on titles, box art, or half a trailer. Like Brick! I didn't even finish the trailer for Brick, I left the house and hit up blockbusters until I found it in a 4 for 20 bin. It took two tries. I will miss blockbuster when it goes out of buisness, I think this will be the first brick and morter store to truely go out of buisness due to an online competitor. That's cool though make way for progress and all of that whatever. I still get exactly what I want when I want it so I am okay with just about everything.

See here is the thing though, I actually thought it would be nice to have a movie night with other people. That doesn't happen to me. I am the emperor of solitude I don't need you. It is true I don't need you but I will cheefully admit that many of you are very nice to have around and I guess that is it. After all I just dropped 130 bucks on two board games to use with my friends. That isn't very solitude like. I should of bought books. So something is changing. On Wensday night I plan on picking up another gaming group which will leave me at three a week. I also plan on starting to gm again sometime in the spring. I don't know when though, James seems to be enjoying himself, I think I will join in now that the Sasha thing has resolved itself and my work schedual seems to have calmed down.

The movie night though, that would be nice. Once a month gather some folks together and screen movies, movies beyond compare, movies beyond belief. I mean there are so many people that deserve to see:

The Fall:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iO0LYcCoeJY

The Foreign Duck the Native Duck and God in a Coin Locker Trailer

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gSamHPq7Pe0

Air Doll:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RI46dEsDaBM

Piano Turner of EarthQuakes
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gOxn6XkCYRA

Life During War Time
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZBKzHhtCTMM

And many others some worth seeing others not. Will it happen? I dunno maybe I'll float the idea to people by writting this blog post and shoving it on the internet to see what will happen. If it doesn't I won't be sad, and if it does I will be moderatly happy in general I have enough people in my life either way.

Twilight Imperium

So on thursday and friday I got to play Twilight Imperium for both the first and second time. This means that over the course of a 48 hour period I spent nearly 12 of it playing Twilight Imperium. Astounding. The first game was mostly a 5 hour tutorial on how to play the damn game. It had some very memorable moments to it and in general it was a lot of fun but we also got some pretty basic things wrong.

So the next game went much better. Some random thoughts:

1) Taking the Imperial Stradegy is scary. It marks you as a contender for the throne and immediatly paints a target on you. Going dead last doesn't help either. The thing is I am not sure how you are supposed to stop that alien who always goes first from always taking the Imperial Stradegy and just winning other than punking their home world. Long story short on the second game we were a good 2 hours in before someone grabbed it for the first time. Then it all became on.

2) Technology is waaaaay more important than I initially thought it was. Paticularly anything that makes your fighters better at fighting and the tech that makes your dreadnoughts move two hexes. I didn't realize this until I watched a player I was about to move in on destroy a neighbor's fleet with a swarm of fighters all of whom hit on a 7 that is what made me retreat and I started screaming through the tech tree. By then it was to late though and the building was about to close so we had to leave.

3) I am going to consider replacing imperial with bureaucracy. Bureaucracy is far less threatening and might help goose people into playing more agressivly.

4) Trade. One player liked taking the trade stradegy and then he would cancel all the trade deals. It took nearly 3 hours of him doing this before I realized just how crippling to the game's ecconomy that was. I wasn't able to effectively use my race's ability which is to take trade goods from people who have three or more trade goods, and all sorts of other people had trouble researching technologies (me), building fleets on the fly, and all sorts of other things. It was actually a brilliant move. Of course eventually, I utitlized a worm hole and punked his home planet. I was going to take and hold them but then a nieghbor blockaded the worm hole so I couldn't get through without starting a major conflict I wasn't ready for because I didn't have any bloody tecs. Heh.

5) I lost. But I had a helluvalot of fun.

6) For the most part the second game was pretty much rules problems free. I need to look up just how often planetary defenses fire but other than that it went really well. I want to play again, right now in fact. But we are going to be taking a break from the game which is prolly for the best.

In short, I am glad I bought the game I truely feel it is worth every penny and I knows that the next time we play things are going to be god damned epic all the way though.

media round up december

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Sex Lies and Video Tape

I think of all the movies I have ever come across this has by far the most evocative title. I've never seen this movie but I hear it is good. The thing is that the title is reffrenced quite often and people seem to pick up on it, but again the number of people who have actually seen the movie is pretty low. A Clockwork Orange is kinda like that. Looking back on that movie I realize I don't like it very much. I has some moments. Some glorious moments in fact, like singing in the rain. But then the second half of the movie kicks in and I all the sudden find other things very interesting, like my feet. This makes it a good movie to have sex to actually since the first half sets the mood and when both of you loose interest you can move in on each other! What? That's how that works right?

I don't actually care that is how it should work. But yeah the whole second half of the movie is kind of a drag for me. Actually I only like the middle of 2001, which I think most people are in the same boat as me. However, I do love all of The Killing, Dr. Strangelove, Barton Fink, and Eyes Wide Shut so it is kind of a mixed bag. This isn't at all what I came here to write but I realized just as I was about to start that my topic was WAAAAAY to ambitious to be just sort of slung around during lunch time so I am kinda flapping in the breeze mostly because I don't feel like reading very much or rather I don't feel like reading very much of the things I have with me.

I was going to write a comparative thing between the 5th Season of Dexter and the prototypical rape revenge movie. Then I was going to talk a little bit about the sort of sacred bond that Dexter shares with death and how he is willing to let Lumen transgress that line to become more like him. This is something that is highly intement and it is being built up over a series of episodes. However, in your prototypical rape revenge movie we have 15 minuts of setting 30 minuts of rape, and the rest is revenge. It would then branch out more onto the nature of revenge and how we view death and things like that. A lot of people have very curious views when it comes to how other people should pay for their crimes. I mean the way people carried out revenge really was something that used to tear entire societies apart and I think that both the idea of the rape revenge movie and what is going on in Dexter really tap into these sorts of elemental forces. It is just that the rape/revenge movie is all about brute force trauma.

AND WE ARE BACK!

YAY! and so out of the valley of death I reamerge as a champion of light wreathed in the fires of victory. Actually I just managed to produce 50k words in one month. Though I forgot to turn them into NANO so I didn't get my chintzy pdf certificate. That is sad. Not really I think I deleated the one I got from last yhear. I am weird about keep sakes. What do you want from me? The thing is though is that the story itself isn't finished. I kinda got a little bit lost in the idea of internal monolouges and wandering around and whatnot. Also for a good half of the novel I didn't like it. This isn't anything against the charecters it just took me awhile to get to know them and decide who they were as people. The more I kicked them around the more I started to like them and the more I got used to having them be a part of my inner sea of people. The novel itself is deadful and the writting is unusually stiff and blah blah blah. I keep forgetting to post it up on the internet but it isn't like I have people bugging me for more parts of it so I don't really care where it is. I am going to finish it though, mostly cause I wanna and partly because I feel like I should. Also because writting has once again become a way that I fill my time and now that I have blazed through most of the new COH content I can retain my usual schedual of writting, reading, and et cetera. So I'll finish it. It won't be like the last novel which had a definite end to it because these are people who are forced to go one with life, some forever, and some will grow old and die. The whole point is learning to live the struggle of trying to have an oridnary life and failing utterly.

However, now that the month is over and I am 50k in I can reel it back a bit and write more when I feel like it and less of I HAVE TO which is nice, I am hoping that the quality will improve but I don't paticularly have any airs about that. I am both happy and sad that it is over and I will continue on in a way so that I am more happy about the things rather than less. More happy about the things. See that I am a master of the english language PRAISE ME!

In other news I've been doing more reading. I finnally finnished Light in August which is the first Faulkner book I actually sat down, read, and enjoyed. It worried me though because I didn't really have a whole lot to say about it. I did feel like doing some racial commentary invovling Mr. Brown's name, actually the whole book had rediculouly easy names to mine for paper topics. However, Brown was the only fun one. Highttower to I suppose but not as much. Hightower is a fun charecter though and his ending segement is wierd and would be a lot of fun to kick around for long periods of time. I think I could get some things going with it but for the most part when I closed the book I was pretty much done with it. So I was worried. Am I broken? Do I no longer desire to write papers on the stuff I read? The last thing I really wanted to root around in was the Kindly Ones and good fucking god how do I love that book. I kinda wanna read it again I mean it was like a ball peen hammer to the face, it was brutal in all ways and yet so uncharecteristicly gental AND FUCKING WEIRD! There were midgets and gay nazies what more could you possibly want? Sex I suppose but whatever it isn't important. So I was starting to wonder if I should close this chapter of my life and move on. Nope. I just got doe reading "The Informers" by Brent Easton Ellis. I had two reactions one there were all sorts of things I wanted to try and write about it, but I knew that if I were to do so I would have to flip the book over and read it again. I started to do just that actually but then I stopped when I realized that I have a shiny NEW book to read and I really wanted it in my mind right now.

The point is that the book made me wanna write. I made me wanna write a lot. It made me wanna write my own book, and it made me wanna write papers. It made me wanna drag out the sublime and smear it all over this book in an attempt to unlock some secrets and I know it would work too because I got that excitiment in my gut that happens when you are on to something and time seemed to slow down and everything goes all fuzzy while my brain makes all these connections all over the place that I know works. I got dizzy and excited and I didn't do anything for over an hour except sit and think of the possibilites. Then I realized that it is okay and I just didn't really want to talk about Faulkner. Great guy don't get me wrong but he isn't who I wanna be when I grow up.

Moving on so I decided before NANO got started as I was hunting around for topics that I needed to write more in my life because I really really shouldn't be having this much competition over what the hell I am going to say while I force myself to write crap for a month. Like this really really shouldn't be a problem, topic selection should be a problem, or maybe getting other projects out of the way should be a problem but not I have 5 different things I wanna write and I can only write one of them. THAT should not be a problem. That is the wrong problem to have. So in the name of coming up with solutions to the thinbgs that bother me I will keep writting. YEAH! Man I wish all my problems were that easy to fix. Write now I am going to tackle two projects at the same time and I plan on doing some siginifigant amount of writting at least three days a week, possibly closer to four. The first thing I wanna do is finnish the novel I've started. I'll make it a coherent literary unit and shelve it until forever.

The next thing I also want to do is to revive NA25. NANO has shown me that profiction is possible when I set my mind to it. When I set my mind to it all sorts of things are possible like being awesome. What kept tripping me up on NA25 is the concerns I kept having about the system. I kept wanting the system to do certain things and as a result I wouldn't write any of the game background. This is retarded. Why I kept doing things like this I do not know but they ANGER me. Ergo I will stop and write up everything I need and then when I got all the extra stuff done I can start the system. I realize right now I am in a great place in terms of finding and getting feed back from a large willing playgroup. So I should get moving on it before things change.

One thing I really wanna do is drame the game in such a way so that it is quite and easy to pick up its background information. I am taking many cues form the forge G/N/S theory of roleplaying but I plan on producing a more cohesive product rather than a game that can only really be played one way a limited number of times. The setting and the rules will remain closely interwined but I believe that the setting can be there to service the rules rather than being sort of tacked onto them. I'll fiddle more with this concept in a little bit for now I think it is best to get started on getting the setting bundled together into a playable shape.

The other thing I want to bring to the table with this game is the idea that players are really only willing or able to donate so much time to reading a book, or more impontly only so much money. Also there is the important consideration that the main way this book is going to be distriubted is in .pdf format. TO that end I want to have the vast majority of the game's setting components to be presented in the format of a hand out. That is, I want them to be one page, single facing, no columns. This way a gm can easily select what informaiton he wants to present to the players in the forms of player packs, or her can give the players information on any of the unfamiliar setting elements in a quick easy to read summary. This way everyone can be on the same page in terms of setting elements and everyone can spend more time playing the game rather than introducing it.

As much as I enjoy running lesser known games like Asylum, SLA Industries, Obsidian, or even Toon getting all the remavent, fun/important chuncks of setting information rooted into everyone's heads takes work. A lot of work. If I can make this task easier then why the hell not eh? SO I want to get started on that. Also breaking the book up in this way will make it easier for me to organize, format information, and present to the audience. For now though it isn't doing any good if it is going to just sit in my head. So out it will come over the course of the next couple of months or so. It involves world building. I LOVE world building it is like my favorite thing to do.

As a side thing I would love to get mutants and masterminds back up and running again but I would need to flesh out more of the game world for that to happen. That's cool though because I actually really like that that game world alot. It has all sorts of elements to it that are really fun to deal with. I paticularly like the idea of the schister lawyer who specializes in getting super hero drop offs out of jail. After all these people certainly weren't given any sort of due process, and my players first reactions was to get the lawyer but it wouldn't ever be that simple.

I truely hope that Grant Morrison tackles this idea in Batman Inc but somehow I think it is to "small scale" for what he is planning much to our loss.

And okay then I think I am done here. For now. Oh and of course I want to do this more, which means I am going to have to find some time somewhere. I'll do it though. Don't you worry. I will. Or not whatever.

Hello old Friend

So nano is happening, I think. I am not really sure anymore. I don't really like my novel. I liked my first one but that is something that I've been keeping bottled up in me ever since high school. Link is a charecter who has litterally grown up with me and while I haven't commited his stories to paper they were always there. Link was the polar opposite of me, moody, depressed, overtly suicidal, strong, violent, and when I started expoloring him I started to become more like him at an alarming rate. It was scary. His stories used to take place in Highschool, he saved Sara from a school shooter that planned on starting a rampage with her. Then he ended up in collage some how, and now he is dead. He doesn't have to stay dead but I read to many comic books and I should just create someone new not hump someone dead. I reserve the right to change my mind.

The book I am writting this year I don't like nearly as much. The charecters don't click and none of them feel very alive to me. I am also having much less fun with it this year than I did last year and it is becoming far more like a chore than something that I should be celebrating. And yet I did spend half of the day deciding what will happen next so I guess I will finish it. That means I absolutely need to write every day for the rest of the month with at least one marathon writting session, but I am more than likely going to need two. Fortunatly I still have two days off, and I have two scenes I am directly interested in writting so I guess it is going to happen. Though I think if I reach 50k and it is still not done it is going to stay that way.

Watch though two years down the line I am going to come back and finish it or rewrite it. I actually want to do a short story in the same vein except I want to use mythological charecters instead of these actual people, so it would be the trumpeter, the anti christ, the 4 hoursemen, the indian god that dances the world to death, and some other people and they would be doing something or other.

That is the thing though, writting has indeed become part of my routine and it is a lot of fun. So I am going to start doing more of it. Not blog writting like this but actual fiction writting. Going back over some of my old notebooks I used to be really bad. Then I got better, and eventually I was really good. Then I stopped. Well now I am going to start again, and get good again. This of course means sacrifices. Naturally I think I should dump some more of my social life in the toilet but that would mean giving up on Tuesdaynight malifuax and I JUST STARTED THAT, and anime club, and my eventual return to gming. So lets not do that. Guess that means city of heroes. Of course coh is one of those games that can be played on a righteously casual basis which is how that is going to happen from now on.

However, the other day at work I realized something. Where I to rank my prefered activies in the order of brain power it takes to be able to do them it would be:

From lowest to highest:

1) Hanging out with and just generally conversing with people
2) Soloing in an mmo
3) grouping in coh
4) Reading most comics, computer strategy games
5) Reading most books and harder to read comics
6) Reading hard books, retaining new information from ttc lectures, most action oriented video games, competative board games et cetera
7) Touhou

It goes on from there. The point is that playing mmos is on the low end of the spectrum of brain thought for me. It is a good thing to do if I am tired or worn out from work but it shouldn't be an every day thing, it definitly shouldn't be something I do for multiple hours every day. And so it is going to fall a little bit by the wayside. I'll still do it, but I definitley want to spend more time writting and creating things, or playing games with friends than playing videos games period.

Also, and this is critical less time just arbitrarly fucking around on the internet. This is the absolute worse waste of time I do and that above all things needs to end. I think it will though. I fell into a pretty powerful deep blue funk this past month. While there I learned a few things that I will prolly write about at a later time. For now though, I am much better and I aim to keep it that way motherfuckers! YEAH!

le novel the second part 2 (complete)

The walk back went by quicker than the walk in. With Winson’s spell disapated the area starts back on its path of being a filthy drug den that any truly civilized nation would feel well and truly ashamed of. They walk quickly and quietly stepping over the bodies of those unfortunate enough to live there, they exchange no words between them until finally they reach the car. As Winston is about to get in John stops him, “Do you want to go get waffles?”. Winson nods in reply understanding that the request is more than a request. It is a command given by someone who doesn’t make commands because people know better than to not fulfill his requests. John neither asked nor cared how Winston had gotten there. He found his own way there and he could find his own way back again to where ever the hell it is he left his car. It was certainly no where near the rat maze and wandering around in the dark looking for Winson’s car is simply not appealing. It is especially not appealing when the alternatives are waffles and bed.
It is the wrong area of the country for a Waffle House. They don’t usually spread this far north. In some parts of the country their multitudes puts Starbucks to shame, but up here? This is the only one for 100 miles. However, nothing hit’s the spot after finding your friend biting off the heads of snakes, and drawing in the dirt with their blood, naked, like a waffle. Waffles are one of the reasons to keep the earth spinning and should the chain ever go under the resulting cosmic backlash would probably result in all the lights of the universe being switched off so that we could try it again, with less Waffle fail this time. Waffle House also has another strange property. As long as the second f and the s are burnt out on the sign then the whole property acts as a cosmic nullifyer. John never tested the extent of how well it works himself but he has spent many a late night, eating waffles, pouring over texts that would drive people mad just to look at him, while some blank faced waitress refills his coffee. He can discuss freely the names of dark outer gods, evil plans, sinister dealings, and this nights events all without anyone around being bothered by it or asking questions. Some of them used to joke that when the dark gods came the only thing that would be left would be him, the god, and a handful of waffle houses with their appropriately broken signs.
The drive passes in scilence, each one trying to figure out what to say to the other. Trying to decide which course of action, if any is best,. And most importantly which toppings they wanted on their hash browns. The after taste of snake blood and poison coated the insides of Winston’s mouth and while he, and he alone would suffer no ill effects from either the venom or the amount of blood he swallowed, it still is nice to have some real food in your stomach afterwards. Moments like these he misses the jungle, the smells, the friuts, the women, the snakes. His rumpled suit didn’t fit right, and he could never quite get used to wearing clothing again, or being fat. That’s something new, something he wished to god he could solve in some way, any other way, than lowering himself to going to a gym where he would have to run next to Ken and Barbie and his desires to kill them both with a hammer and feed their bodies to a constrictor. Inside the smell of grease, eggs, and regret wafts through the air. The waitress who looks as if she has seen one to many late nights, and heard one to many forbidden secrets clops over and then words pass in the form of both of them making their orders before the icy scilence resumes. Winston can feel it. He needs to go first. He needs to be the one who breaks the ice, who begins talking, who admits that things could of gone just ever so slightly better. After a minut of fiddling with things around the table he finly draws himself together and decides that it is high time to get this whole thing over with, “So, tonight could of gone better don’t you think”
John raising his eyebrows replies, “Oh I don’t know these things happen, I mean in terms of cockups this could have been a whole lot worse like the time Mary disappeared for a weekend and managed to found, brainwash, and finnish off an entire suicide cult. My my that girl can get things done when she chooses to.”
Winston smiles a little bit. It is a sick wan little smile, the runt of all other smiles, and like all runts it died quickly and quietly leaving his face blank and ever so slightly sad, “You know I wasn’t planning on killing those two girls. I don’t even know where they came from. No one should have been able to enter the building, and I am postive they weren’t inside before hand. I mean sure we are all big on the human sacrifice thing but not those girls. I mean even if I wanted to their bodies were to damaged, they might of injured the snake. It much prefers new mothers…”
John cuts him off with a dismissive wave of his hand, “I don’t think it really matters either way. Those girls aren’t particularly a main issue, and in two to three years they won’t be an issue at all, they will instead be an abstraction. I can only hope that their transition to death is pleasant one. What I want to know is, what is it you were doing down there in the first place?”
Winston stopped and fumbled around a bit for words before stopping, taking a deep breath and trying again. This happens a few more times before he gives up entirely, “I have no idea. I mean part of me, the good parts, they are still beholden to the snake god, and he still wants out, you know? I am still his high priest, and so sometimes instinct takes over”
Mild celebrations along with mellow fanfare, the waitress has brought the coffee, John sips it quietly as Winston absently stirrs his Hi-C. Terrible coffee and yet there is something about it that never fails to bring John home. Setting the cup down he resumes, “Yeah but you’ve fought it off before, I mean I don’t really understand why it is you’ve regressed now. Is there something I missed, some sign I should have been aware of, something I could of done…”
Shaking his head Winston smiles, “Sorry there buddy boy. Not even you can be everywhere at the same time. I know I’ve watched you try and it always ends up with you here, beating yourself up, sometimes with a dead body in your trunk, sometimes a live one, but it is never a good time. Now look I don’t understand everything I do, and I don’t understand everything I am. I guess it is one of those things like black out drinking that alcholics go through from time to time. It is just that these things happen”
John looked skeptical, “I don’t think how that works, I am pretty sure yo- oh hey thank you very much” Their food had arrived, and along with it a truce. The topic dropped for now, as it always is because there are some things you just don’t discuss over food, especially Waffle house food and so the conversation veered off. They talked about work, their homes, vacation plans, and for awhile they became normal, or as normal as two people like them can be. When they had finished, and their all star specials had been cleared away that John returned to the topic, “You know in a lot of ways I guess what you did tonight shook me so much because it reminds me of when I first found you”.
Winston nods, “Yeah I had a complete breakdown, there are still parts of my life that I have not been able to put back together and parts of me are thankful for that. I’ll talk about it at group tomorrow. For now though I am beat. I am not like some of you, I still need to sleep”.
Checks were paid and hollow requests of being asked to return were endured as the two of them stepped back out into the cool night air. John nodded over to his car indicating that John wasn’t letting Winston out of his sight until he was back at his house. It isn’t that Winston couldn’t get a cab, or that John isn’t above letting his friend find his own way home. It is just that over the years John has realized that Winston is a cagy little bastard who knows far more than he says. His cards are always played close to his chest and he never gives out more information that he has to. He has a feeling that tonights insident was truly unplanned. He also had a feeling that Winston is one of the few people on the planet who, if he put his mind to it, could hide something like that from John. Power does funny things to people and there isn’t anyone on the planet that embodies that trueism quite like Winston does. As he saw Winston off to his deceptively normal looking suburban household John drove off into the night, his place of residence being quite a ways away. While stopped at a red light he looks around seeing the world abandond to sleep or business that needs to be atended to else where, he does all the silly little things necessary to keep the car from rolling off by itself and pops the trunk. Walking quickly twords the back of the car he grabs the girl, not exactly roughly but certainly not gentaly and shoves her into the back seat. He then quickly rechecks her bindings and gets back into the car, puts it in gear only to see that the light is still red, “Jesus Christ” he says to his new traveling companion, “This light always this long?” She doesn’t even bother with the muffled screams through the gag anymore. He nods to himself as he drives off.

***

It isn’t long before they are out of the city, John smiles quietly to himself. It has been a long evening, not exactly an unproductive one, but a long evening none the less. The girl in the back seat looks particularly dejected which is to bad really, because it is a very nice night. After a minute he looks at her in the rear view mirror, “Sorry about all of this. I had planned to be done with you long ago, but Winston, Winston turned my evening into a series of small complications, complications that you yourself have become a part of. You don’t really know him but Winson isn’t what he looks like now. He once was a down on his luck insurance claims investigator. Who lived with a woman who he onced loved very much but ended up not liking him very much. She cheated on him, he knew it, but he decided not to prance about it. He knew that she could never be pleased by he, he also knew that she was barren as a pile of rocks floating in space, and after awhile of dealing with he bitterness and resentness he just wanted to be left alone by her and allowing her to continue on with her stupid little affair seemed to be the best way. Just out of high school life once seemed so full of possiblilites. He landed a good job, a beautiful wife, and he didn’t even need to mess with college. Now at 25 he is locked in a marriage where he occationally gets to have sex with someone who resents him. His salary that seemed so great right out of high school wasn’t looking so hot 6 years later, and more and more life began to press down upon him like a great weight from above.
Now my dear this is where things start to change. To put it succinctly his rise to power started with some very unassuming beginnings and became nearly catastrophic in terms of results. How he ended up in the jungle isn’t clear to anyone and believe me most things are clear to me. Like how your upbringing imbued you with a lack of confidence and that is why you dropped out of Grad School. You should go back once you get over tonight’s events you will feel better about yourself. Anyway, as best as I can piece it together Winston stumbled upon some old texts and part of an idol, and then somehow, from these scraps, he managed to extrapolate the location of a lost nameless civilzation that practices a particularly brutal form of magic. Once he found out where they were he went down there, apparently he accidently fulfilled several prophesies all at the same time, and they took him in just as he was looking to go native. They taught him the dark arts, which he mastered at a record pace, and at one point he came so close to ending the world that he could taste the skin of the great serpent god’s hide as his slithered against the arcane barriers that Winston and he cult were looking to bring down. It made Jamestown look like a pickic from what Winston described it as. These people didn’t just do simple blood sacrifices. Their rituals went on for hours, sometimes days as they would carve away pieces of the victems bodies to sacrifice to the snakes in the area, poisosn has to be consumed along with hallucingins that haven’t even been discovered by the western world. Oh no no, don’t worry I am not going to do all that to you. For one I don’t have the time, and two it wouldn’t serve any real purpose. No no your role in all of this is going to be very different. But man I mean these people? They put Grammora to shame, and yet at the end of it all, something happened. Me? Well I was a man, who was dealing with his own demons at the time. I found him wandering those back alleyways, not to far away from where I grabbed you. Winston refuses to say how he made it back to America, heck he refuses to say where exactly in South America his cult is based out of. TO everyone else Winston looked like your average run of the mill hobo, with his dirty suit, wild eyes, and incomprehensible muttering. However, not every hobo mutters in an ancient language, undiscovered by academia that is used almost exclusively for magic. That sort of thing tends to single you out if you have the right kind of ears.
Now my first attempt at trying to reel in Winston didn’t go so well. He screeched like and animal and ran off, and in my hurry to persue him I almost didn’t notice the traps he had left behind. Like I said he really is a cagey bastard. He doesn’t talk about it much but I am pretty sure he and a few other members of his cult used to hunt people for sport. I can’t verify this but they would capture people, and train them up for months, sometimes years in the art of survival, hand to hand combat, some weapons then they would let them loose. It wasn’t so much of a hunt but more of a ritual battle that takes place over a series of days. Anyway the bastard is hard to catch lets just leave it at that. Now I may make the odd mistake but never twice. So the second attempt went better with me ambushing Winston in his lair I was able to subdue him, break the spell that had his rational mind locked away and then I brought Winston back from the brink. At what cost though? I mean when I first dug him out he looked around uncomprehending , then slowly over the course of that day his actions caught up with him. It was there that Isaw it. I saw it in his own eyes when he looked in the mirror, I saw it when he looked into his eyes, I saw the loss. There was no guilt, no remorse, no crushing realizations of the crimes he has commited against humanity. No beating of the chest crying out to god for forgivness for sin which could never be forgiven, no tears of remorse, no desire for absolution, sympathy, and above all no regrets, no regrets save one. He had lost most of his power. The power, that caused people to slit their own throats at his very command, the power that made women fall at his feet, the kind that scattered children before him, it is what allowed Winston to dine on baby flesh and drink the blood collected from the virgins he has most recently defloured. It is the power that let him talk to a god, to hold the fate of the world in his hand, and while some one feverishly suckled upon his errection he could look into the eyes of all that is unholy and decide that it really is time to let it all burn. All he needed to do is pave the way. He didn’t blink when he looked into the abyss he didn’t make a deal, instead he ran to give it a helping hand. To let it in. To welcome it home, and if that meant turning the universe to ash then so be it. That is the look I saw in Winston’s eyes, and on that day 4 years ago he decided to form the group. It was a look of a man who had failed to end everything and is left with the crushing responsibility of having to keep on living for the rest of his life. There are others like him, like Winston I mean. People who were going to shake the world and for whatever reason they didn’t. Now life goes on, they are still alive, living with a loss far more profound than anyone else could ever understand. I like to call them the world shakers and for better or for worse they are all in this together. You are a part of all of this too even though you don’t know it yet”
John looks back at her to make sure she is alright, and that she hadn’t somehow broken her bonds but she has long since passed into that phase of captivity where they become docile. He probably could take out her gag now and have it be alright but as of late he’d become prone to migraines and there is nothing like overly histerical screaming to set one of those things off. So he left it in. She didn’t really look like a vomiter, it is always so sad when they choke to death like that. Besides they were here. John pulls to a stop at an undescript part of the road and gets out of the car. Fondling the ring in his pocket he becomes flooded with dark thoughts and wicked possiblities. There is so much he can do with someone like her, so much power he could gather, energies he could unleash. He didn’t have to give her back and the others would never know what he did. He’d managed to mask her from Winston and that is no easy feat. Something he was exposed to in the jungle made his senses incredibly keen, and why not? He looks at her and he can feel the old urges rising, the ancient instincts kicking in. He’d have to act soon, this is the sort of person he would spend months at a time looking for. Working quickly he moves aside some brush he had placed over a grave he’d dug earlier that week for this very purpose. For a moment he looked at it with pride. You don’t get perfect corrners like that without practice. That is something that all the magic, all the skills, all the god like power in the universe can’t give you. The sort of satisfaction of a job well done. Already tired of dealing with her for the evening John doesn’t bother being gental and with one quick motion he grabs her out of the car and tosses her into the open grave. Now the panic is starting, causing him to grimmace as her frantic scrabbling ruins his handy work. “People just don’t appreciate the little things in life” he mutters to himself. Sliding on the ring, he removes the knife and makes another incision on his forearm. Not deep just enough to get a drop or two of blood out before it clots over. Waiting for a second he can feel what had taken up residence in the girl release its hold and slither away and she immediately passes out. Sighing, he grabs her out of the grave and tosses her bodily into the car. He’d drive her back into the city tomarrow, for tonight, tonight is now officially over and there is literally nothing that will stop him from getting into his bed and passing out.
Back on the road he’s begun to wonder if it is all worth it. He isn’t sure how the girl ended up with a transdimentional pericite but it was almost as happy to leave her body as she will be to be rid of it. It needs to be in grave dirt so it did everything possible to put her there. Of course it couldn’t just make rocks fall on her head so that she’ll die, but instead she started doing significantly more than light exparamentation with drugs, she had fallen into the wrong crowd, and all the sudden her life started veering out of control. Almost any one in the group could of done this to her, more than likely though she did it to herself. Being spiritually void leaves you open to things you wouldn’t believe. Most people get off lucky. Fortunatly, she won’t remember any of this and she will wake up on the couch feeling worse for ware, most certainly but otherwise okay. Hopefully she will use this to turn her life around but unlike the world who has some pretty impressive defense mechanisms people tend to prefer habits to improvement. So very sad.

***

The night was long and the day was so wearingly trivial that the idea of going to the meeting has about as much appeal to John as letting some extra dimensional tentacle beast have its way with him, again. Still he couldn’t just not go, not this week certainly. The others would take it poorly if he skipped out after saving Winston from himself. So at the appointed time he went to the appointed community center, unlocked, the room, put on the coffee, and set up the chairs. There weren’t many of them and while their meetings are never posted the managers still kindly keep a room free for them. He was told that they were running a meeting for alchoholics anonymous where anonymity is especially important. The sweet old guy didn’t ask any more questions after that he also kept a room for them, in a back corrner of the building where they were least likely to be disturbed. Never the less after putting on the coffee John began the cleansing rites, words have a way of sticking to surfaces and the things they talk about shouldn’t even be let alone kept around. It is a nice place and John aims to keep it that way. Soon they begin showing up, Jared is first. He smiles, proudly holding up 2 packages of doughnuts that he absconded from his job before setting them down on the table next to the coffee pots which were well underway. Jerimia came in soon after him. You would think that with Jared’s specialty being computers, and Jermia’s being what can only be called “mad science” that the two would get along. Instead the temperature of the room fell 10 degrees and they sat on opposite sides of the room trying hard not to glare at each other. Peter and Solomon come into together, talking excitedly about different sacrificial rights the two of them have used over the years. Oddly enough the two of them were ideologically at odds with each other and yet they had become such good friends. Carla the lone female strode in soon afterwards, haughty, quiet, she some how made you feel inferior to her even though she is wearing a sweat suit, sneakers, and two day old makup. She sits next to a window and lights the first of many many cigaretts. Stopping her from chain smoking isn’t even remotely possible. Still they can do something to midigate the smell. Steve just appears out of thin air. It took them years to get him to stop using fancy explosions or bizarre light effects. It isn’t so much that they drew atension but more that they were annoying. He looks around cheerfully, clearly in a good mood before snagging a seat, and lastly Winston wanders in. His cloths are clean and yet they look exactly like the same thing he wore yesterday save the tie.
As Winston settled in John stood before him. Sharp angular features, black hair slicked back, and a black suit that ran all the way down and simply cried out expensive, he looked more like he is ready to attend a dinner party with the president and not head up a meeting for the people the world has forgotten. He looks around the room and smiles, “Hello everyone, thank you for coming. Before we begin does anyone have any good news they’d like to share?” Carla blows smoke rings, and the rest do their best to not meet his eyes, John sighs inwardly. No one ever anwers that question, “Well then I guess we will get started lets bow our heads” John is always the first to bow so he doesn’t have to see who follows suit. He’d be surprised by the results though. Peter for example always, without fail bows his head and while he never makes it through more than half of the prayer before bursting into flames he always follows along. It is just understood that whomever he sits next to, usually Solomon that they are on fire duty. No one could understands why didn’t Peter just leave the room when the prayer starts. It is as easy as getting up and walking out, and yet he never does, and through blackened lips he always chokes out an amen. Once the prayer is over the others wait respectfully while Peter grows back his skin and changes his cloths. It may seem like a strange thing to do every session, but hey the alchoholics do it so what is the worst that can happen other than dealing with the smell of burning hair.
Today is like no other. All the meetings start more or less exactly the same. If there is one thing John loaths it is routine for routine’s sake. Once everyone is seated John takes up the lead, “Alright then time to reinstate our purpose. The year was 2000. For whatever reason we all were engaged in activities that would of ended the world on that day. We all did calcultions, saw signs, read prophesy and we all prepared. For whatever reason the end didn’t come. We failed even though everyone who followed us believed us to be infallible. Now the world keeps going despite our best efforts to the contrary, and we all need to keep living. We all have our problems getting on with life but I believe that by using the same dedication we all felt towards ending the world, we stand a chance at saving outselves.” John winced inwardly. That was pretty cheesy even for him, but it is hard leading a group of people twords something that they didn’t even believe was possible. “Alright, well before we begin with today’s lession does anyone want to talk about anything that happened this week? Without raising his hand (Winston always raises his hand) Winston starts, “Unless anyone has anything pressing to say, I I’d like to go first, if that’s alright”. They all turned and look at him as Winston fidgets impotently then after letting out a heavy sigh, “I-I I I don’t know. I guess you could say that I might of sorta had an incident last night.” Winston looks around the room judging reactions before hastily adding, “John managed to dig me out before things got to out of control but I had managed to summon several snakes and I was about to turn two girls into vessles through with the snake god would be able to use to reach into our world and excert his influence. T-they weren’t anyone important though, no mayor’s daughter or the mother of some diplomat. It wasn’t like the o-old days where everything was bad. They weren’t going to make the best vessels believe me, but still it nearly happned. I, I used”. He hangs his head looking not so much ashamed but more tired than anything else.
Jared looks over concerned, “Why Winston, I mean what set you off do you know, I mean there was that incident a couple of years ago where I just blanked, and it was Steve who found me with a ram chip up my ass, did something like that happen to you?” Jared and Winston are remarkably similar. Niether one of them is groomed for power, both of them just stumbed into it almost by acident. Both of them had their share of growing pains and while Winston was very eager to turn off the lights, Jared has a slightly different view of how the end of the world needs to work.
Winston thought about it for a moment. He seemed to be turning over the words in his head, trying each and everyone out before moving onto the next one. Then he stood up and started pacing around the room. At first his steps were slow heavy, leaden, a man beaten down by everything that came his way. Then they start to become faster and a light appears in his eyes, he stands up straight and turns to adress the room, “You know who I don’t miss? My wife.” Winston’s eyes become shaper, clearer, and while nothing noticeable changes about his stature, a subtle shifting occurs where he goes from a beaten down sad old man to someone who can sit with anyone in the world and feel completely at ease, “You know, I mean, I just don’t get it. I loved her, I mean I really really did. I, I would of done anything for her, I opened doors, we shared a place to live, and why, why couldn’t she just fucking be happy? You know I never used to swear before I was married? I always thought if was beneath me but then I met my fucking wife and somehow somewhere she decided that it was going to be so much better to be a compleate fucking bitch instead you, well you know, loving me back. It is no wonder that I went away, fell from grace, and let this absolutely terrible mindfuckingly scary death snake god into my soul, a place where I should be cherishing my wife and family. No instead I am feasting on hallucingins out of severed heads while sitting on a throne made out of rotting bodies decoding prophesy so that when everything was right we could bring down the great caticysme upon the entire fucking world and everyone in it.” He stops for a minute and glares around the room daring anyone to meet his gaze, but everyone is doing there best to not to meet his gaze, even John finds himself suddenly very interested with some dandruff that has accumulated on his shoulders. Squareing up Winston continues, “There was this point, this one point while I was striding around the village doing whatever the hell it was l felt like. It was close to the end then, and we were busy preparing for the snake gods arrival. All around I could hear the moans of my followers as they were trying to make it so that we would have as many babies as possible for the pit that would serve as its point of entry so that upon bursting into our world he would receive a nice dose of baby flash. That wasn’t even in the prophesy anywhere I just thought it would be a nice thing to have happen. Anyway, I came across a shine that someone had set up in my honor, and inside of it was the picture I had in my wallet of me and my wife. At that point I hadn’t seen her for years and at that point l had been given up for dead, I don’t really care it isn’t important. When I saw that picture of me and her together, I remembered how happy we were, and how happy we could have been, and how happy I wanted to be. I loved my life, my house, not so much my job but it let me do other things, then out of no where she turns into this, this bitter, resentful bitch, and for what? For not forcing things on her, for letting her stay at home? No. It was that day. That day that I saw that picture of us, that I realized why I am doing this. :People, the normals, they don’t want to be happy. Oh sure they say they do, they say a lot of things mostly because they don’t fucking know what they are talking about. Instead they do their best to ruin their lives, to cry about things that don’t matter and to turn a blind eye to everyone who truly really needs help. All the poor, diseased, the starving, none of that fucking matters because your husband is a fucking looser and did everything he could to make your life easiy and happy so that gives you the right to be a stupid fucking cunt. It was on that day, THAT day that I became rededicated to wiping our silly stupid race off of the face of the planet. Well fuck, fuck me for not succeeding and fuck all of you for failing. The world sure as hell isn’t any better off having been able to go on, and those two girls sure as hell aren’t living happier lives. At least I would of given them a purpose in life before using their souls to fertilize the snake god’s eggs, why the hell are we doing this?”
Carla raises an eyebrow, blows a smoke ring as snidely says, “Bravo”. He glares at her balefully, “No really Winston”
“Wilson”
“”Whatever” with a dismissive flick of her hand she continues, “You, you had your self a specialized cult, well more like an army really. On your whim they would surge forth and do your bidding and lets face it you secretly terrorized that entire continent until it all went tits up on you. Me I had to build that dedication out of people. Scraping it together from the ground up from the broken, shattered, egos of little men who had little dreams just like you did. Silly, sad little dreams. Once they found out that their dreams were impossible they look for new dreams. I’ve always felt you would have been better off as one of mine, lining the foundation of my mansion. I see now that you really do deserve to be who you became. So bravo.” She then puts her cigarett back in her mouth and continues to be utterly disinterested in the group meeting that is happening around her, almost as if she has always been in this room, sitting in that chair and this meeting is some horrible interuption of both her space and time. Absently, staring out the window she thinks a bit about Winston’s words. The others give out advice or ask silly questions but one of them really get it. He is the sort of guy that comes in last except in the only place that counts, and that’s the sack. It makes sense that his methodology for ending the world involves him becoming a servant to something else be it a wife that doesn’t love him or a god that more than likely plans on devouring him immediately upon entry into our world. That day is the- you know he never did answer that question.
When she looks back on the group John is staring at the creepy mad scientist guy who is shrugging his shoulders, he then does that thing where he somehow reassumes command of the room with just by shifting his posture and says, “Thank you for that. I am sure no one will take it into due consideration. Now then back to the original question which was never answered, “What exactly is it that set you off?”
Winston, who is distracted by a a conversation with Jared is caught off guard, like a sorority girl who suddenly realizes she helped the wrong broken armed man at the beach, “Honestly John, I don’t know. I’d like it to be something simple. Something easy like, it was our anniversary, or I saw her in the grocery store, or I got possessed by a wandering spirit, or that a hallucinigine fuled flashback sent me over the edge. However, none of that happened to me. The stars aren’t even in any sort of useful alignment to get anything done so anything I would of accomplished there that evening would be cursory at best. I guess it mostly just boils down to the face that I really just felt like taking it all out for spin. I-I mean what can I still do? I mean am I the only one who used recently?”
Jared rolls his eyes, “Well no I did swoop into the unternet last week updated some spells, and I used it to kill my downstairs nieghbors dog with my upstairs neighbor’s to loud sterio system. Canine spirit forms are weird and I almost killed half of the block by mistake. Then I turned its soul into an intelegent virus that stikes at the screens of portable apple products. Mostly because those people piss me off”
Carla smiled, “Oh well I guess I’ll play along too, since this already has been the most I’ve participated in years. Just the other day there was this darling little man who was singing in the car next to me. So I followed him home murdered his wife in front of him and turned him into an empty shell, his voice however, well it isn’t very good but oh I don’t know I need to keep my youthful looks some how and he’ll be good enough for at least a couple of years, much like our friend Winston he was a man of potential locked into a world that denies him everything.”
John leans forwards, “Carla what did you do with the body?”
Peter speaks up, “Oh they just pinned it on the husband since he just liquidated his accounts and vanished the next day no one really thinks anything of it. You know how people are, once they got a job to do they will just find the most obvious way possible to aproche it and call it a day. Its sad really, but hey that’s what makes the bosses job so easy”.
John never looks tired, he never looks confused, he is always in control and he always knows what to do, except at these meetings. These meetings can be one of the most confounding things in the universe to him, “And I suppose you have been off doing things we all meet here and agree not to do?”
Peter shrugs, “Well I just regrew all my skin, oh and I had to beat up an angel, then I had to beat up a demon, but you know. If I don’t use I die so it isn’t quite as easy for me”
Solomon laughed, “Oh oh I got a funny one. So l have all these tomes right? Like stuff full of dark, evil, mystical energy that can flay the mind right out of your skull. Heck there are some of them that you have to feed first before they will let you open them. Those books are intense, they aren’t even proper words on page but actual-”
“Solomon! Some of us have places to be”
“Oh sorry Jerimia. Anyway so I am moving all this stuff around, packing it away, securing it, trying to make sure that it doesn’t fall into the wrong hands because even though it is going to be a LONG time before the stars become right again, they still can do a lot of damage. Anyway, so I drop this one book, and I end up knocking over a couple of jars of stuff, you know I can’t even remember what is in half of these things its been so long and this big nasty wet thing from a place between places ends up getting summoned. So I got to unpack all my crap, find my gun, get some protective sigils out, and I spend the next two nights trudging through the god damned sewers looking for this thing. I tell you what I’ve seen some stuff in my day but this thing? Jesus. It wasn’t that mean but I can still feel its eyes inside of me burrowing around looking for weakness, but I had to use a crap ton this week otherwise it would have been bad. Not now, it would of gone dormant for 10 years but then it would start to capture and feed off of people, definitely not a good thing”
“Is it really that easy to summon something”
Solomon shakes his head back and forth while trying to find the right words to explain, “Well Peter these things don’t have a conventional form you know? They just kinda are, summoning them is easy if you have the right stuff that they can slid into. Now controlling them? That is the tricky part. Kinda like how making a deal with the devil is easy but dealing with the consiquences is not”
Peter nods, “Its strange how after all this time I never knew that, why is that?”
A cloud comes over Solomon, he kind of just shuffles his feet and looks down for a bit, “Well you know it is hard sometimes to talk about it. These things aren’t like angels and demons they…fuck I don’t know. I forgot how to tie my shoes for a year because of this but god help me I can’t even put it all away without something happening”
Peter cringes, “Sorry, hey look I can do some pretty fancy things with magic and whatnot, maybe I can help out a bit, you know if you want to.”
Solomon smiles wanly but John steps in before anything else can happen, “Well I would say this has been a productive session, I am seeing some real progress happening with everyone. Before we go for the night there is something I want to say. See we, all of us, we are the people who would of shaken the world and in a lot of ways we did. No one knows exactly what we’ve done but if it wasn’t for us this world would be a different place one way or another. I know it is hard just trying to learn how to live life again but damnit it is our world too. And just because we don’t waste our lives with tv, or cocain, or cocain while watching tv doesn’t mean we all have to be miserable it… it just means we should live inside some certain rules. Rules we gave up when we became who we are but rules we should respect now that we are back within the world again, like no more killing, Carla. Mostly though help each other, that’s what we are going to try for this year, helping each other like, like Peter and Solomon. In the spirt of following the rules our time is up so lets clear out.