Let them Weep

Oh man. MAN man man. I can feel it, deep down scratching about in my soul. Dancing around in my peripheral vision always staying just out of reach, whispering into my ears, while brushing its fingertips lightly against the hinterlands of my hair in the secret way that drives me absolutly insane. It is deep seeded it draws my state and I realize that I am nearly powerless against it, a nice cool glass of poison that I can drink all day long because the day is hot and the flesh is weak. Sickly sweet and crystal smooth. I got the heady rush of addiction.

To pokemon of all things. I have an addictive personality, or rather I have a highly focused personality that tends to fixate on things for long periods of time combined with a rational process that includes the words, "Fuck sleep" and "and I don't need to talk to people". Oh my yes. The worst thing is that I am not even playing the new Heart gold or Soul Silver, no I am playing through Platinum which is a version of pokemon I've ALREADY PLAYED THROUGH. It would be terrible if I didn't find it to be so wryly amusing. Still the second play through is going much smoother, I know where the snazzy pokemon are, I to go get a gibble so I can level it on my way up through the game because gibble=easymode. I know where I can find earthquake and because I am playing the game with a flash card I can clone the shit out of certain items and whatnot come anime club on thusday.

I don't know what it is, something about gathering up a poketeam and getting its move set to be just right is something that I find to be highly appealing. There is just something about the entire process that makes it so that I have an unusually hard time focusing on anything else. That's the way of things though. I know that this will last for a month or two, maybe more and then I will move on to something else. This is because as interesting as I find Pokemon to be there is a point where things just start going WAY TO SLOWLY. Getting things to lvl 100 is a huge fucking pain in th ass and that is where you really get to see payoff's like when you check a pokedex's base stats against what you have and you realize you got your evee just right. Or something like that, look I am obsessed with evee's leave me alone. I am totally making an all eevee hit squad. Okay in reality I am making one perfect eevee and cloning the shit out of it but FUCK it. By the time I get my one perfect eevee I will have more than likely have gone through 8 billion eggs. I need my eevee to have either a modest or mild nature and I need to breed wish into it. So once I get one you can be damn sure I am holding onto it. This way I can lvl one eevee up to 36, give it baton pass, clone it and have one eevee of every type for me to lvl. Baton pass plus wish is a wonderful combo and since it is going to have a high special attack I can just lather on some pretty special moves for it to use and I will be set! Set as in I will be able someday play pokemon with someone. I don't know who as most of my friends no longer play, but sill the thought is nice and as I've said before I like doing stuff like this. My nippon ichi game save files are like that which reminds me that I really want to start playing Phantom Brave again cause that game was AWESOMEly underrated.

Its strange. There are things I want to do, things I want to read, to write, to learn, and experience. Sometimes it is hard to justify playing video games in a world that has so very much to offer me. I do my best to keep it all in perspective and that is the whole purpose of this blog post actually.

I am here, and granted I am writing about Pokemon, but the point is that I am here in public not actively playing it. I am loosening its hold over me so that when the hours pass into multiples I will have an easier time putting it down and doing something else. After all I want to get NA25 up and into a playtestable state by this summer so I need to get to work on that. By summer I mean June, late May. I figgure since I have all sorts of people who will jump at me GMing something I should take advantage of it and playtest the shit out of my ideas.

This is all well and good and I would actually like to write something else...BUT I am hungry. I had plans for another blog entry but foiled by food. Though I don't go in until 4 tomarrow so maybe if you are all good I'll write another post. Most likely not though cause fuck all y'all. :)